Hello All! My name is GlorpZorp, but my friends call me Glorpy!

Today is a bittersweet day, as I am extremely excited to announce that I have earned a job as a writer for Marvel, but that also means that I will be too occupied meeting celebrities and writing scripts to be posting on this blog. Thank you to all the loyal fans who have read each and every one of my entries and have not overreacted simply because I am an alien. You are all greatly appreciated. 

Goodbye to all of you, and keep an eye out for GlorpZorp Katawk in the credits of the next MCU film! 

written by: GlorpZorp Katawk March 7, 2020 (12:09 a.m.)

Hello All! My name is GlorpZorp, but my friends call me Glorpy!

This week I dove into more of my followers’ writings, and, oh boy did I find some interesting stuff! A fellow writer on this website, FutureGamingPro (I am not sure if this is his first name only or his first, middle, and last name put together for dramatic effect), has written a lot about a game that he plays: Super Smash Brothers. I have gotten a lot of free time recently here on Earth as I have settled in to my new apartment and am applying for jobs, so I thought that I would research video games. Video games are fun, interactive games that one can play alone or multiplayer on a multitude of different consoles, whether it be PlayStation 1, 2, 3, or 4, Xbox (I do not know how many of these there are), Nintendo devices, or PC! 

Since my family sent me here with a generous monthly allowance, I decided to buy one of each console, the latest of course, and try my hand at gaming. The first game that I actually enjoyed was Call of Duty: Modern Warfare. Currently, the tournament game mode is very entertaining. I regularly play on the PC that I built myself (lots of free time!) and I prefer it much more than the other consoles. My go-to loadout is an MP7 or an MP5 as the primary, with either a shotgun or pistol as secondary for emergencies. I keep a grenade and stim pack as my lethal and tactical, also for emergencies. The maps that I like to play on the most are shipment, atrium, stack and rust. For some reason, the smaller the map, the better I do! A new map called Bazaar was added recently; I have only played on it once but it is a very small map and seems very fun. So far, with my insanely fast alien reaction time, I have won every tournament that I have participated in, but the opposing teams say very rude words over the mics. They sound very young, however, so it makes me wonder how their parents would let them say those words to other beings. I am too afraid to speak to them, though, so I have just never bought a microphone. 

I have been told that there are older versions of this Call of Duty and have played a minimal amount of Black Ops III; my only two reasons to play that game are that I can split the screen and play with my friend Baljeet on my PC, as long as he uses a controller, and for the infamous Nuketown map. Other games do not appeal to me as much. I attempted Fortnite, but I would continue to lose health from fall damage. If I were to actually jump off the barn in Frenzy Far in real life, I would be in perfect health!

I am getting too immersed in video games, which is an issue among a lot of teenagers and young adults. I must get back into my writing, apply for more jobs and get out of the house. If I want my dreams to come true, I have to start acting! Hopefully next time I write to you all, I will be an employed man alien!

FutureGamingPro’s writing: https://futuresportspro.game.blog/blog-feed/

written by: GlorpZorp Katawk March 7, 2020 (12:01 a.m.)

Hello All! My name is GlorpZorp, but my friends call me Glorpy!

I was surfing through my feed on my new instagram page, @GlorpZorp (follow me if you have an account as well!), when I saw a very sad video posted by an account that showed a child getting separated from her parents. The caption, which read “this young girl, who was born in the country, has been separated from her parents after they were deported because of their illegal immigration into the United States,” lead me to do some light research on what the word “immigrant” meant. An immigrant is someone who enters a new country to live there permanently―this can be done legally, with a lot of patience and the right papers, or illegally, without papers and more travel. I came to wonder why someone would want to leave their home to enter a new country, but then I realized that even on Kawakatawk people would leave their homes because of religious persecution, for better opportunities or even in the case of natural disasters. On Kawakatawk, though, anyone is allowed to leave and emigrate/immigrate anywhere on the planet as they please. I understand also that people who were born in the country feel as though their homes and jobs are being taken, but they do not understand how much luck was associated with them being born in a privileged country. If they were born in a third-world country, they would also want the opportunity to move to the United States as well. What I believe is even worse, however, is that there are people who want people deported so badly that they would be alright with purposely separating a family and leaving a child alone in a completely different country without their parents, which I recently learned would put them in a foster home. Foster homes, as I have seen in multiple movies, do not always end up treating a child properly. Kids may have to bounce from home to home for years before they find somewhere that they feel at home, if they even find a place at all. Otherwise, as soon as a child becomes eighteen years of age, they are no longer required to be in the foster care system and can roam the streets alone, attempting to find their way in the world. I think that, although illegal immigration causes problems with jobs, there should be an easier and quicker way for those who want to come to the United States to get here legally, as long as their intentions are valid and clear. I heard that the wait can sometimes be more than ten years to have proper paperwork to enter this country legally; who wouldn’t rather take the risk and just enter illegally for the sake of their families and future? Technically, I, too, am an illegal immigrant, but my parents and the rulers of Kawakatawk made an agreement with the rulers of Earth, so I have all my papers in order―if only it were that easy for the actual residents of this planet.

There needs to be someone in charge who takes care of the people instead of the rules. The election is this year, so we will see what becomes of that. I cannot wait to vote; see you all soon! 

written by: GlorpZorp Katawk February 28, 2020 (4:10 p.m.)

Hello All! My name is GlorpZorp, but my friends call me Glorpy!

I have recently read an article written by a user called “waveyman,” where he somehow advocates that the rich should be able to spend their money as they choose, even if that means bribing educational institutions. Although I have not been on this planet for too long, I have learned that education is a deadly weapon on Earth. If one is not educated, they are not able to start a career, most of the time, and, therefore, cannot make enough of a living for themselves to survive. On Earth, there is a series of schools that a human must go through in order to “graduate.” First, if a child’s parents can afford it, a child attends pre-school, in which they learn the basics of the alphabet and how to get along with other children. Then, a child moves on to Kindergarten, where they begin to learn how to read and write. Afterwards, a child goes to elementary school, which takes about 6 years, from first grade until sixth grade. Then, middle school for two years until eighth grade. Lastly, a child attends high school, where they get slightly advanced education preparing them for the possibility of higher education in college or university. That is when the amount of money that a parents has impacts a child’s education. Even if a child excels insanely in their studies, is at the top of their class, and decides to go to college or university, if their parent or parents is not in a financial situation to be able to afford the school, the child may have to drop out or not attend college at all. That is where I think that waveyman is incorrect. If a child was luckily born into a rich family, even if the child has no commitment to their studies, even if he or she skips class and does not care about school, this unworthy student is granted immediate access to a higher education at a prestigious university, all due to their parents’ income and bribery. The system is flawed in that way. If a student is worthy and committed, the government should make sure that that student is enrolled in the nation’s top universities; after all, the children are the future of the nation, and they are the ones who will innovate and improve the nation’s technology and healthcare. The huge amount of cases worldwide, and nationwide alone, of rich parents making huge “donations” under their child’s name to ensure the enrollment of their unworthy, uncommitted, uneducated child in prestigious universities is only now being discovered and exposed―imagine the amount of cases that have not been uncovered by the public and imagine how many rich kids are enrolled in high-end schools like Princeton and Harvard who do not deserve a place in the school. I guess opinions differ across the spectrum, but as an outside viewer, every child should be given an equal opportunity to get into schools based on their grades and not their parents’ income. Waveyman may have a different view since he comes from a rich family, but everyone has their opinion. Thank you all for reading!

*In response to: https://wordpress.com/read/feeds/102715064/posts/2581615850 *

written by: GlorpZorp Katawk February 16, 2020 (2:54 p.m)

Hello All! My name is GlorpZorp, but my friends call me Glorpy!

As I have been surfing the internet, I have stumbled upon a new and rising website/application called Tik Tok. Tik Tok is a video-sharing application that is owned by ByteDance, a Beijing-based company founded in 2012. Although the app was launched in 2017 for iOS and Android, it just recently fell into the spotlight and became known to the masses in a positive light. Aside from the funny name that it’s creators have given it, the social media platform has risen in fame so quickly, even after many celebrities said the app was deemed to fail. Some influencers did not support the new platform because of its similarity to an old, insanely popular platform called Vine that was taken off the Appstore. They called it a “rip off” of the original that would never reach the same potential that Vine did. As time passed, however, more and more people began watching the short, funny and witty videos that anyone can post on the platform. The platform rose in popularity as people, mostly teenagers and younger children, began watching, liking, commenting and sharing these videos on other social media platforms. The application is responsible for many viral dance challenges, new viral dance moves and viral music. It is easy to use―even I downloaded it and have made a Tik Tok or two! Being easily accessible to young children has raised Tik Tok’s popularity even more. Little kids are creating quick, easy videos and posting them for the world to see. Gaining popularity as a creator is also incredibly simple that even one video could result in instant fame; there is a custom “for you” page on Tik Tok that is customized to a user’s likes, showing recommended Tik Toks from lesser-known or popular users that have similar content or humor. If a video ends up on a “for you” page, it is almost guaranteed to go viral on Tik Tok. The keyword here, though, is that it will go viral on Tik Tok, and Tik Tok alone. It is so easy to go viral on Tik Tok that there is not really huge respect or honor to Tik Tok “Stars.” They are not given much monetary compensation, either, unless they are paid directly from the audience or from a sponsor, which is incredibly rare on Tik Tok. The app, however, has issues aside from the monetary compensation. Tik Tok attempts to make sure that all of its users are above thirteen, but there is easily accessible mature content that should definitely not be seen by thirteen-year-olds. In addition, it is very easy for even younger children to lie about their age and also access the same content. If the creators could somehow fix this small issue, I think the application would be an absolutely hilarious way to pass time and get ideas for comedic videos. A smart idea that some people have had is getting their small start on Tik Tok, and once they go viral, they start a YouTube channel to gain a larger following and more respect; maybe I can do this and then promote this blog!

written by: GlorpZorp Katawk February 14, 2020 (4:20 a.m.)

Hello All! My name is GlorpZorp, but my friends call me Glorpy!

I was scrolling through my followed blogs and I saw a title that interested me: “Mamba Out.” A time traveler named Ekko wrote about the death of Kobe Bryant, an apparently very loved and popular member of the population. (I find it absolutely stunning that humans have figured out how to time travel but have not yet created flying cars, it’s very similar technology, believe it or not.) On January 26, 2020, not long ago, Kobe Bryant and eight others, including his thirteen-year-old daughter Gianna Bryant, died from a helicopter crash in Calabasas, California. I had heard about this on the day that the tragedy occurred, but I put it off as just another accident; I had no idea that the impact of the death of this pair would cause such grievance across the world. I had heard the name Kobe before, but I had thought it was in reference to the special type of beef (that is absolutely delicious, by the way). Apparently, Kobe Bryant is considered to be one of the best athletes of all time, joining the NBA (National Basketball Association) straight out of high school and spending his entire 20-year career with the Los Angeles Lakers. He has won multiple awards and trophies throughout the years and has been determined to be one of the richest athletes of all time!* There have been so many stories written about this tragedy and even more stories written about things that have happened after the tragedy. In an interview, Gayle King, a journalist for CBS news, brought up an alleged sexual assault case against Bryant in an interview with Bryant’s close friend Lisa Leslie. As a result of an awfully cut video posted by CBS of this interview, sixty-five-year-old King has been receiving death threats for disgracing Kobe’s legacy.** On Kawakatawk, we would not make such a big deal about one who has passed, whether it be our king or just a peasant. After the funeral ceremony, the loved one is often remembered with prayers and such, but no one is interviewed about the passed one’s death. If I were to decide whose behavior is incorrect in this situation, I would say neither and both. King should not have brought up the sexual assault case, especially to a close friend of the recently departed, but humans are human and they make mistakes; mistakes are allowed. Hardcore fans have the right to be upset at King, but they should not threaten her since they probably have made innumerable mistakes in their lifetime as well. Snoop Dogg, a well-known, highly explicit rapper (rapping is fast-talking over music), also joined Bryant’s fans in an explicit message saying that the reporter should back off, but then later saying he meant no harm and that he, and all his fans, are non-violent people, not threatening the safety of Gayle King. In all honesty, Dogg had no reason to join this social media argument and probably uploaded his message onto the internet out of anger—humans tend to do not-very-smart things when they are feeling an overwhelming amount of any emotion. In the opinion of a completely outside viewer, from a whole different planet, everyone involved in this situation needs to relax and gather their thoughts before tainting a famous human’s legacy or scaring an old lady to death. Everyone should leave King alone because mistakes are what makes you all human—and, honestly, I am starting to feel more and more human the longer that I am here.

*https://wealthygorilla.com/kobe-bryant-net-worth/

**https://deadline.com/2020/02/cbs-news-chief-blasts-threat-against-gayle-king-1202854846/ 

*In response to: https://wordpress.com/read/feeds/102803592/posts/2580324981 *

written by: GlorpZorp Katawk February 8, 2020 (7:19 pm)

Hello All! My name is GlorpZorp, but my friends call me Glorpy!

I recently made my first friend here on Earth! I was sitting in a Starbucks Coffee shop and a man in a turban came and asked me what time it was. I checked the time on my laptop and told him; he then said that he had a lot of time left over before work and decided to sit down with me. After talking for about 45 minutes with my new friend Baljeet, we exchanged email addresses and he left for his job. We talked about things like his work, family and hobbies, but what interested me most was our discussion about his turban. He told me he was a Sikh man. Sikhism is a monotheistic religion, believing in only one God, but following the teachings of ten different Gurus, all of whom took the form of humans on Earth. Sikhism was founded in 1469, by the first of the ten Gurus, Guru Nanak Dev Ji, in the Indian region of Punjab. Today there are upwards of 30 million Sikhs worldwide. In addition, there are over 700,000 Sikhs in the United States. Similar to how Christianity has Jesus and the Bible, Sikhs believes in the Almighty creator Waheguru, who has blessed the world with the Sri Guru Granth Sahib Ji, their Holy Scripture. Despite being one of the most recently developed religions within the last 500 years, Sikhism has grown to be well-known. While earning a place in the top five largest religions at one point, the practice of Sikhism’s ideals have not been accepted by the masses. After the 2001 terrorist attacks on the Twin Towers, many people have begun to confuse people with turbans as Muslims, completely ignoring the religious difference between a dastar (Sikh turban) and a turban-style headdress worn in Islamic cultures, even though 99% of those in a turban are Sikhs. Although no such discrimination should be taking place towards any culture, misdirected racism and slurs have completely transformed the way that Sikhs identify themselves in public, from young boys cutting their hair to fit in and youth of all ages being called “terrorists” simply because of their appearance. Baljeet and I briefly discussed this phenomenon, as his young twelve year old son had just asked his parents, who never cut their hair, if he could get a haircut to stop the other boys at school from bullying him. What is a parent supposed to do in this situation? Forsake their religion for their child or teach their child to be proud of their faith? Apparently, there are countless instances of situations like this and just as many kids leaving their beliefs behind in fear of others. On Kawakatawk, we are all inclusive of each other’s beliefs, whether we believe in it or not. We make sure to teach kids from the start not to make fun of one another and we teach teachers specifically to make sure they can see signs of bullying from the very beginning. Baljeet is on a mission to educate all people about Sikhism and its roots of kindness, free help and sharing, so Sikh children in the future will never have to hide or worry about their faith. Hopefully, this article helps spread his message.

Baljeet is following his goal, just like me! I think I will see a lot more of him, since I already sent him an email earlier today. I am excited to have someone to discuss my writing with!

written by: GlorpZorp Katawk January 31, 2020 (1:20 pm)

Hello All! My name is GlorpZorp, but my friends call me Glorpy!

I have heard about the new virus, “Coronavirus,” from a fellow blogger called Rowan Nolan. I also heard about this virus from people on the street, who said it is highly contagious, meaning that a single cough into the air from an infected person could infect another completely healthy person. On Kawakatawk, there has not been a viral infection since 1382. Our healthcare and technology is so advanced that we have quarantined whatever disease has entered our population; apparently Earth is not at that stage yet. The virus originated in Wuhan, China and was, at first, confined to the country. It has been said by the mayor of Wuhan that about five million residents fled before the lockdown of the city, either because they are leaving for a Lunar New Year celebration or that they are afraid.* Many Chinese cities, though, have banned long-distance buses, which is an amazing move, to ensure that the infection does not spread. Some provinces have even said that inner city buses will only be able to leave the station if there are temperate screening measures in place to prevent the spreading of this highly contagious disease.** China’s officials had to dig trenches at the border to ensure that no one else would attempt to leave the country. Somehow, because of someone’s carelessness, the virus has spread and there have been three known cases in the United States, the most recent one being in my state of residence, California. The infected being has been quarantined, as far as I know, and hopefully will not be infecting anyone else in the state. I am not sure if I could even be affected by this illness, since I am a different being, but it did spread to humans from animals, so I am slightly worried. It is ok. I am a very strong species and, therefore, will be able to beat any infection that decides to enter my body. There are many funny pictographs that I have seen on the internet and my social media, some may call them “memes,” making fun of how “Coronavirus” sounds like a virus originating from “Corona,” which is a liquid intoxicant consumed through the mouth to feel good, even though it has negative effects on the liver, which has the important function of filtering the blood that comes from the digestive tract before passing it to the rest of the body. There are other memes as well. Other memes are more dark and rude, including the mocking of how the disease spread from animals to humans, saying that the Asian culture eats any living thing. Why is it that the human race is so rude to any customs that they are not used to? If one culture sees something as a delicacy, others should at least respect them if they are not open to trying it themselves. Americans, especially, have a hard time understanding that different people like different things and do different things, even though America is a place where everyone comes to be accepted and find their own place.

*In response to: https://visualizingthefuturewilligetback.photo.blog/2020/01/24/coronavirus-the-u-s-seems-to-care-about-this-one/ *

written by: GlorpZorp Katawk January 26, 2020 (3:22 p.m.) *link to article updated 2/8*

Hello All! My name is GlorpZorp, but my friends call me Glorpy!

I was walking down the street yesterday and a man in ripped, piecey clothing was sitting on the sidewalk with a sign that said “Anything helps. God bless you.” I was baffled. What was this man doing sitting in the cold with a hat sitting in front of him? Then, the most amazing thing happened. Another man, in a suit and tie, walked by this man and put a dollar bill in the hat without even a single look at the man sitting on the street. At this point, it was obvious that I was observing this apparently normal phenomenon for much longer than I should have, so I walked behind the man in the suit. Low and behold, another man was sitting on the street one block down, but the suited man did not give him a dollar. Why? Is it a first-come, first-serve basis? Or did the suited man merely like the first man better? 

After sitting down with the second man for a little while, I learned that he was not sitting on the street for fun. He was poor. Poverty is a very prevalent issue in America, in some cities more than others, but it means that one does not have enough funds to provide for their own shelter, food, and care. I did some research and it turns out that more than 1 in 8 Americans in officially considered “poor.” In 2017, nearly 40 million people lived below the poverty line in America, and about one-third of these were children.* On Kawakatawk, my home planet, we would never allow our own race, our own people, sit on the streets and beg for food. Everyone is provided a house, and as long as they work to move society forward, they live happily. Many of these homeless people I see on the streets are able-bodied and could get a job with training. Do these people prefer to be homeless or are there no jobs available for them? Being poor also means that these people have no money for doctors’ visits; America needs someone who will work for the people’s well-being―for ALL the people’s wellbeing, not just those with money. During the current leader’s reign, the poverty level has fallen to its lowest level since 2001**, but there are also innumerable amounts of articles saying that the orange man’s policies favor the rich, that the way the administration proposed to measure poverty makes poor people disappear, and that other proposed plans would cut more than three million poor people off of food assistance. In a previous post, I discussed a man called Bernie Sanders who is trying to rule America; he believes that the U.S. economy is rigged by banks and the wealthy to ensure that those below the poverty line do not get proper funds. A man with similar ideas currently leads Kawakatawk, and although we are not sure that this Bernie will follow through with his promises, someone who can provide for ALL citizens of America, regardless of their socioeconomic status.

Good luck to all homeless people―although I am not sure how one would access this blog…

written by: GlorpZorp Katawk January 24, 2020 (2:04 pm)

*The article responded to: https://wordpress.com/read/blogs/171422257/posts/35 *

Hello All! My name is GlorpZorp, but my friends call me Glorpy!

I am trying something new here for my third post on my blog; I will be trying to interact with readers and other writers by responding to another recent blog post I have read. Guinevere, or magicsnakelady, has recently written about the queer community on Earth. Before reading her article, I had no idea what “queer” even meant. It sounds like a funny word to me. After doing a lot of research, I learned that queer, in the book of English definitions, means strange or odd. The rest of my knowledge came from Gwen’s post. Similar to Gwen, we do not have the idea of “gender” on my homeland; in fact, identifying under any gender or label is looked down upon. That is why my planet has advanced so much, so rapidly―because we do not judge others on their labels, and we let everyone with talent have equal opportunity in the field they are talented in. As soon as I landed on Earth, I was immediately aware that there is a split on the planet between males, those humans with a phallus, and females, those humans with long hair (usually). Although some humans choose to defy these labels, men sometimes keep their hair long and others choose not to be defined by any gender, they are looked down upon, cast out of society, and made fun of. Who decided these societal norms and why? Why can’t anyone put their hair up in what is called a “ponytail” or tie it in a “braid”? Not only does the way one styles their hair get ridiculed, but the gender that one is attracted to receives the most derision. The community who has been called the LGBTQ+ community, representing lesbians, gays, bisexuals, transgenders, queer people, and anyone else not cisgender heterosexual, has suffered continuous mockery on the streets and also in public films, even though they have tried to stand up for their rights through “marches,” in which members of the community and its allies walk with posters depicting the injustices the community has faced. This is a yearly event and I am excited to attend the next one in San Francisco. For context, a lesbian is a woman who is attracted to women, a gay man is a man who is attracted to men, a bisexual person is someone who is attracted to both genders, a transgender person is someone who was born in the wrong body and decides to switch genders, and queer is an umbrella term for sexual minorities. Other sexual orientations represented in the “+” include pansexual, asexual, and intersex. There are even stories of parents of children disowning their child because they are part of this community. I find it appalling that, after raising a child for their whole lives, a couple would kick them out simply because of who they fall in love with. Attraction is attraction, and it cannot be controlled. Family should always be there to support each other, regardless of one’s partner. A person is a person and deserves to be treated as so and given all the rights promised to them in America by the law and government. 

The longer I stay here in America, the more I realize it is not as liberating and free as I thought. Maybe I am missing some research―or at least I hope I am. Until next time, keep your head up, and if you’re part of the LGBTQ+ community, know that you have just gained another ally! (… or member, I am not sure what I am let alone what I am attracted to).

written by: GlorpZorp Katawk January 19, 2020 (5:29 pm)